A Plan Comes Together

Hannibal, B.A., Face, and Murdock are creepin' on a comeback. That's right, folks, after months of uncertain rumors, Fox has announced that Bruce Feirstein will write a screenplay for a film version of The A-Team. Normally, I wouldn't think much of the guy, as he's only written the Pierce Brosnan-era James Bond movies (excepting Die Another Day, but that's a good thing!) and those weren't exactly cinematic gold. But hey, who ever expected that of the A-Team? This could be a good thing. The "it's so bad, it's good" kind of thing. What could be better than that?

Oh wait, check out this quote from producer Stephen J. Cannell: "Not to denigrate the TV show, but nobody ever died. We drove cars off cliffs and people got out and walked away. We're not going to do that [in the movie]. In this the tone is more dangerous -- you can really die. It's very tense and exciting." He went on to say that the film will be "less cartoony and more serious, in the vein of Die Hard and Lethal Weapon."

Does he seriously not get that the "cartoony" style was what made the show so great? I swear that I will not watch the movie if it does not involve some scene in which the group gets captured by the bad guys and locked in a garage-slash-warehouse prison, where they easily free themselves of their binds, knock out the guards, and find mass raw steel materials and welding tools enough to construct death machines upon which they ride to their escape and obvious victory while shooting wildly with abandon using the many dozens of automatic firearms they obtained in some inexplicable secret stash that just happened to be laying around. I don't know, it's been years since I watched the show. Memory can be a weird thing. Maybe that never happened. If it didn't, I still like my version better.

Whew, I made it through that without the obligatory Mr. T reference...